…that’s who I am.

I pride myself on being a great family member, friend , co-worker and just all around great helper. I think I got a gold star in 1st grade for being the helper….and that has transitioned to my adult life. I don’t know what it is but I love to help people in any way that I can. If I can make it happen, whatever the case may be, you better believe that I am going to try my darndest to succeed in doing so. I’ve found that I may not be the best at this or that, and I may falter at one thing or many but one thing that never fails is my heart…which has led me to and through many of the most rewarding and heart wrenching times throughout my thirty years of life. I have found myself thinking of very creative ways to show the people around me how much I love them without simply saying those words. I’ve found that even the smallest acts of kindness reap some of the most rewarding memories for me and for the receiver. I always do things for people because it is wonderful…because just the act leaves footprints on hearts that may not have ever been placed if I hadn’t stepped in…because it’s always so much more than just one thing….and because it makes me feel great. The people in my life mean so much to me because they allow me to learn from them, live through them and experience so much with them. I have found myself wanting to do things for people that are simply impossible such as take away some ones hurt and pain. In my mind I know that it is ridiculous to think I can do that yet I feel myself taking on the hurt and pain, anger and strife of people when they share with me what it is that bothers them. I feel the hurt and pain…the anger and strife as if whatever caused the feelings was directed at me. I have no idea how this happened to me. There are so many people around me that can let things like this slip right past them. Why can’t I? Where can I find a happy medium in giving so much and also making sure I’m good to go? I never really considered this seriously until today. Never have I done anything expecting a return. But I feel like most often I’m the giver and less often am I the receiver. This is nothing in comparison to what our Lord has done for us, but I sometimes think of my simple life as being (in a very, very miniscule aspect) like Jesus’. Always giving, and never expecting a return. Doing great things for people even when it sometimes backfires in my face yet still going back when help is needed once again. Loving people even when I’ve been wronged by them. Doing what I know I should do when so many others wonder why.

Perhaps I’ll never know why I do the things I do. I know that it would take a whole lot to ever try to make a change. In fact, I think that it is near impossible. Is this my life’s calling? To help others? To be a self-less being working for the good people of the world? To work hard when others can’t? Maybe this deployment/mission is God’s personal message to me as to what my life’s job is to be….a helper.

I don’t know and perhaps I never will but I plan to keep doing the good things I have done…solely for the pleasure of doing it.

Thanks for stopping by…and for listening...
Keisha